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Legion
Category Action , Thriller
Year: 2009
Time: 100 minutes
Production: Lionsgate
Director: Scott Charles Stewart
Cast:
Paul Bettany, Dennis Quaid, Lucas Black, Tyrese Gibson, Kevin Durand
MPAA R / UK15
Our Rating 2/10 - Just because it's about Angels which is usually a good movie subject
Watchability 1/10 - Never again. But still a little better than Drive Angry 3D!
Contributed by WB
Tag-line When the last angel falls, the fight for mankind begins.
 
Plot:

The Armies of Heaven have amassed to reign down an apocalypse on mankind. A group of survivors hold out in a diner in the badlands, and hold the key to survival in the form of an unborn baby. Their only hope is in the form of the arch-Angel Michael who has taken their side in the fight, but is that going to be enough to make it through the day?

 
So, how does it end?

So after the scary Ice-Cream driver, the possessed people keep coming, and with an insane amount of bullets Michael and the humans fend them off.

Slowly they are taken out one at a time - Percy is soon to go, when he rescues Sandra from an attack, with a few deep acid-type wounds to his back. Makes you wonder why the 'angels' didn't jump into the bodies of people in the diner - would have been a lot easier! Maybe that was explained and I missed that bit so it's not just a big plot-hole (I did fast-forward a lot of it - it's a terrible movie).

Kyle is tricked to rescue a family, but it's all a trap and he is surrounded. Audrey goes to help him, and the others convince Michael to be brave and bring her back. Her mother goes a little crazy, so they chain her up.

Soon enough Charlie gives birth. They think it's all over, but this magical baby (I don't think any of that is explained either??  Let us know if I'm wrong) must survive, although now the dodgy humans can't touch them. So Michael is going to fight it out with Gabriel, to give Jeep, Charlie and Audrey a chance to get away with the baby.

Crazy Sandra tries to give the baby up, but is shot by Michael, and drops the baby. Jeep is able to catch him. Bob tries to be a hero, but doesn't last too long against the Arch-Angel.

Jeep and the good guys walk past the possessed people who line up with their heads bowed - except a creepy girl in a hood who tries to hit them with a pinata stick. They get into a Jeep (I get the in-joke) and speed off.

Michael gets out some guns, but it's no match for Gabriel's "wings of steel".  Soon they're just wrestling, with Michael trying to perform a sleeper-hold. Gabriel finishes off his old friend by driving a steel rod through his own shoulder, and through Michael's heart. Michael dies.

Bob begins laughing, on the floor behind the counter. Gabriel walks over to him. The gas pipe has been damaged -- and Bob tries to flick his lucky lighter. Suddenly the whole place explodes, sending Gabriel flying out the window and vaporising all the possessed people outside.

On the road Gabriel quickly catches up and hitches a ride on the Jeep. They can't shift him, so Jeep (the guy) slams on the brakes. Gabriel is sent flying - but unfortunately so is Audrey. The car overturns. They get out, and safely assume that Audrey hasn't made it.

To get to a safehaven that was announced on the radio they start to climb up a mountain. Gabriel follows and catches up to them near the top. Suddenly Michael shows up - this time an Angel again, having earned his wings. Apparently God has had a change of heart, and Michael was right all along. He defeats Gabriel, but doesn't finish him off and shwos mercy. Gabriel flies away.

Jeep, Charlie and the baby climb the mountain to look into a valley ahead to see a little community -- surely the most isolated community this side of Tibet.

Later, they're back on the road (surely a little bored of people who probably haven't discovered the joys of modern technology yet --- like velcro and buttons). And they don't seem too happy with life. But at least they don't need to fight against any killer robots, yet.

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